


(more than) a broken vow

by showhyuks



Category: Monsta X (Band)
Genre: Heavy Angst, I AM SORRY, Infidelity, M/M, Pain, Past Infidelity, good old ao3 user showhyuks angst, the tags are so god damn depressing i am sorry again
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-15
Updated: 2018-10-15
Packaged: 2019-08-02 13:33:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,010
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16306094
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/showhyuks/pseuds/showhyuks
Summary: “Hey, Hyunwoo.” Minhyuk says. His husband looks at him silently. “Will you tell me his name?”Hyunwoo is taken aback, his grip on Minhyuk’s hand loosening.“Tell me his name. I want to know.”





	(more than) a broken vow

**Author's Note:**

> alright kids listen to Lara Fabian's Broken Vow while reading this, ok!  
> link here!

 

 

_“To the ends of Earth, I promise to love you endlessly.”_

 

Minhyuk clutches his phone close to his chest, pacing around the room with a frown etched on his face. It’s the third time this week alone that Hyunwoo’s gone home past eleven—not that he’d mind it before. He knew his husband worked hard, enough for them to be able to afford this sky-high unit in the middle of the city close to their workplaces.

 

A year ago, he wouldn’t have dreamt of living in such extravagant conditions. But Hyunwoo quickly climbed his company’s ranks, and soon enough, he carried Minhyuk like a proper bride five months ago to their unit, with the brightest smile on his face as he kissed Minhyuk over and over before bringing him first inside their shared master bedroom.

 

But it’s different now.

 

Not when Hyunwoo used to come home only smelling like pine trees after a rain shower—strong, musky, breathtaking. Nowadays, Minhyuk does the laundry with his lips pinched, trying hard to not think about the faint smell of lavender and lilies by the collar and sleeves of Hyunwoo’s button up.

 

_“For until the day my heart stops beating, my life and soul will only be bound to you. And only you.”_

 

He sits down on the crimson couch in their living room, recalling the time they were going around furniture shops, bickering over the smallest details of what they wanted to include inside their new home. Minhyuk remembers Hyunwoo shaking his head at this couch, only for him to eventually say yes when Minhyuk promised he’d let Hyunwoo choose their bed. (Which, Minhyuk ended up still choosing on his own, because Hyunwoo loved Minhyuk so much and just a pout was enough to make him crumble.)

 

Another unlocking of his phone to reveal no notifications from Hyunwoo makes him sigh. He’s trying his hardest not to goddamn break down even before his husband came home. Who knows, maybe he’s stuck in a meeting? Stuck in traffic? Stuck in the company with—

 

He buries his face in his hands, willing the thoughts away. There must be some reason why Hyunwoo’s been late for a while now. A reasonable explanation to the smell of lavender on his clothes. A perfectly acceptable reason to explain why he saw a text from a contact named _Intern_ texting Hyunwoo’s personal phone, not his work phone, while Hyunwoo was taking a bath and Minhyuk accidentally sees the phone lighting up from the message.

 

> **Can’t wait for Friday! x**

 

And Hyunwoo didn’t come home that Friday night, a week ago.

 

But there must be some reason for this, and Minhyuk would listen to whatever Hyunwoo has to say because he loves him, and knows he wouldn’t lie to him, and do this to him, and this is just his insecurity gnawing at his insides after not spending much time with his husband for the past month. This is just his past trying to come at him again even if he has tried his hardest to forget. He believes in all the promises and vows they’ve made to each other. He believes in Hyunwoo’s love for him.

 

(But when was the last time they even ate at the same dining table?)

 

Yet he’s slept early for the past week, not minding that he sleeps alone by 10 in the evening. He didn’t want to worry Hyunwoo by staying up late for him, and as long as he wakes up in the wee hours of the morning to the calm, sleeping face of his husband, that’s all he needed. He never forgets to kiss Hyunwoo’s forehead before preparing for the morning rush, where they never actually get to interact much anymore, because he’s needed in the daycare he works at by 7 A.M., and that’s only around the time Hyunwoo wakes up. He never forgets to leave behind a breakfast plate for Hyunwoo, though.

 

(Even if Hyunwoo has barely touched the plates he’s prepared for a while, now. So he ends up having it for his late lunch everyday. Not that he’d minded it before.)

 

_“I can never see myself loving anyone else. It will only, always, forever, be you.”_

 

A _ding!_ from his phone catches his attention. Thinking it’s his husband, he quickly unlocks it only to be bombarded by Line notifications from his and Hoseok’s chat bubble. The messages starts with, 

 

> **Hey, Minhyuk. Just got out of the company. And I think you might want to see this.**

 

See, he met Hoseok around the time he met Hyunwoo years ago; they were close friends who always spent time at the gym. They’re now working together at the company where Hyunwoo works at, and as far as he knows, Hoseok’s from a different division and works at a different floor. This is the first time he’s ever sent him anything regarding Hyunwoo and their workplace.

 

Attached is a dimly lit photo Hoseok must have taken secretly, because it looked like he was behind a wall. Nevertheless, it is still clear enough for Minhyuk to make out whoever was in the photo, and with a heavy, shaking exhale, he types back a reply.

 

_“I promise to make you happy, to never make you cry, to be the reason why your life will be beautiful, until we’re old and grey. I promise to become the only man you’ll need in this lifetime.”_

 

Past one did the front door finally click open, Hyunwoo silently taking off his shoes by the rack close to the door. He loosens the tie around his neck, aimlessly entering their home because Minhyuk perhaps forgot to leave the lights near the door on.

 

A lump on the couch stops him on his tracks, and Hyunwoo carefully approaches Minhyuk’s sleeping figure. With a small smile on his face, guilt pressing down on his chest at the sight in front of him, Hyunwoo slowly shakes him awake.

 

Minhyuk opens his eyes, and only then does Hyunwoo sees the dried tear tracks on his eyes.

 

“Hey,” Minhyuk says, sitting up slowly and reaching out to touch Hyunwoo’s cheek. He cradles his face as Hyunwoo kneels in front of him, and Minhyuk catches a whiff of that lavender scent again, repressing his emotions instead. It isn’t time yet. “Have you eaten already?”

 

“Uh- yeah.” Hyunwoo replies, eyes avoiding Minhyuk’s gaze. Minhyuk lifts his head again, and their eyes finally lock to each other. “Why- why are you sleeping here? It’s cold. You should be in bed.”

 

“It’s because I miss you.” He says with a sad smile on his face, now cradling Hyunwoo’s jaw with both of his hands. “And I will miss you even more.”

 

Hyunwoo wraps his own hands around Minhyuk’s own, holding it close. “Why? Work?”

 

Minhyuk nods. Then shakes his head.

 

“No.”

 

 _“And no matter what happens, in every lifetime after this, I’ll find you over and over. I’ll love you over and over. Lee Minhyuk, you will own the entirety of me until- until you get tired of me, perhaps?” Hyunwoo chuckles. Everyone inside the small hall laughs, and Minhyuk, even with the tears adorning his beautiful face, laughs with them. “But I’ll make sure you won’t ever get tired of me, first._ We’ll be together forever. _”_

 

“Hey, Hyunwoo.” Minhyuk says. His husband looks at him silently. “Will you tell me his name?”

 

Hyunwoo is taken aback, his grip on Minhyuk’s hand loosening.

 

“Tell me his name. I want to know.”

 

Minhyuk tightens his hold, lowering their hands so he can feel how Hyunwoo’s hand lightly shakes.

 

“Minhyuk-ah, I-“

 

“Just tell me their name, Hyunwoo.” He’s surprised to hear how calm his own voice sounds. But he can hear the pounding of his heart, threatening to claw its way out of his chest. This is what he’s always been afraid of, and to see everything they’ve worked so hard to create, crumble to pieces in front of him, makes him wonder where they started falling apart.

 

“Minhyuk, Minhyuk- please look at me.”

 

That’s when he realizes he’s closed his eyes. That’s why it was dark for a while. He opens them to only see bits and pieces of Hyunwoo, distorted and unclear, his tears not letting him see the devastated expression his husband has on his face. But he pulls back the threatening sobs to escape from his mouth, closing his eyes tight and opening them to shakily smile at his husband.

 

“I will miss you so much.” He hears the sadness in his own voice, and wonders if it’s even his own, because he’s never sounded this…  _broken_ before. “I- I will miss you.”

 

Hyunwoo’s the one to take a hold of his face this time, wiping the stray tears away. “I- Minhyuk, I love you so much. Look at me. P-please look at me.”

 

Minhyuk hears the broken sob from Hyunwoo, and for a moment, he considers forgetting what he had planned to happen then. But this was never the case, because back when he was younger, when his father left him and his mother for another woman, his mother cradled him to bed that night, kissing his forehead.

 

 _“We let go those who want to leave us, baby.”_ He remembers his mother saying, admiring the strength she had for not breaking down in front of her child. _“We let them go so it wouldn’t hurt much anymore for us and for them.”_

 

“I want you to always be happy, okay? I’m doing this because I don’t want to hurt you anymore.”

 

He stands up and feels Hyunwoo’s hand holding him down. Minhyuk smiles down at him, patting his cheek.

 

“For you have given me happiness and peace in the times you’ve loved me,” ‘ _loved’,_ Minhyuk realizes, is a very heavy word. It means a love from the past. Perhaps it is fitting for that moment. He doesn’t dwell on it much. “I want to let go of you in a peaceful way as well. Please do not make it any harder than it already is.”

 

Hyunwoo stares up at him, looking so torn and wrecked and kneeling with his empty hands on his thighs, itching to reach out to Minhyuk. Crying was never the best look on Hyunwoo, and Minhyuk hates seeing tears on Hyunwoo’s eyes. He stops himself from wiping them away.

 

Packed and ready to go, he only brought the things he was sure he bought on his own. He didn’t dare bring anything that he knew Hyunwoo bought for him. He’ll even leave his phone behind, because it was Hyunwoo’s gift for his birthday the year before.

 

He’ll really hate being reminded of all the broken promises he’d tried to keep close to his heart, the ones he would have never broken himself.

 

He walks to the front door of their—Hyunwoo’s apartment, slipping on his old rubber shoes he found in his dresser. Holding his light suitcase with a trembling hand, he looks back one last time, only to see Hyunwoo still kneeling where he left him, head down and eyes closed and stripped off the usual strong atmosphere he always had. He looked miserable and small. Minhyuk only wishes he’d find happiness soon again.

 

That’s all he ever wanted—for Hyunwoo to be happy.

 

And if that isn’t in his arms anymore, then who was he to not let go of Hyunwoo so he can be happy in whoever’s arms he’d found happiness at again.

 

“It’s very unfair, Son Hyunwoo.” Minhyuk calls out one last time, his voice resonating inside the quiet apartment. “You really made sure I won’t ever get tired of you,” he chuckles sadly. “But that isn’t the case for you, I guess.”

 

  _Minhyuk’s eyes were gleaming with joy, holding Hyunwoo’s hand as he slips a ring on his finger. “Thank you for holding my hand when no one did, back then.”_

_“Of course.” Hyunwoo smiles back at him, eyes crinkling. “I’ll hold your hand until the end of time.”_

 

Minhyuk softly closes the door on his way out, not looking back this time.

 

**Author's Note:**

> this was all [mel's](https://archiveofourown.org/users/momojuusu) fault.  
> kidding.  
> but seriously. no thanks to me listening to this song since yesterday, i just HAD to do this. sorry kids.
> 
> i know i have a lot of shit to write updates for  
> but  
> hahahahahaha  
> i love u all <3 
> 
> as always !! kudos and comments are very much appreciated !!!! i read every single one of them, even if i dont reply!! (to not mess with the numbers T__T)  
> aaaand i'm on [twitter](http://twitter.com/shownmoong) sometimes too!


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